I had this whole post worked out about the rest of Thanksgiving; the food, the laughter, the family love fest... but then I got distracted. It seems to be a theme this week. I came home from work today, both pockets of my slacks stuffed with little scraps of paper upon which I'd written snatches of the many varied things in my head: bits of plot idea; how to work a rubber chicken into a sex scene; character names. Yeah, just a little distracted. I know I worked today. I know I worked hard. Ummm, not too sure what I worked on, though.

Anyhoo... why I'm not blogging about Thanksgiving: HDTV. I saw a commercial for HDTV today. You know, Hi-Def and all that's supposed to rock your television viewing? It's so awesome, it's like you're actually there! Inside the TV! With Jurassic Park dinosaurs! Yeah, sounds like fun to me too.

So, the distraction part... I have a question: If you're watching a commercial on a regular old TV and it's showing you how awesome pictures on an HDTV look (thus, you should run out and buy one immediately or the TV fairies will come and punish you for depriving your children of true quality television viewing)... then why do I need an HDTV to view it? Didn't I just SEE the difference myself, on my regular old TV, thus proving it's pefectly capable of true quality television viewing?? And if I DIDN'T just see the difference on my regular old TV, then how the hell am I supposed to be sold on an HDTV through a commercial (that is a LIE) on my regular old TV???

Inquiring minds want to know. Or maybe just my poor tangled, distracted one. Moving on! Back to Thanksgiving for just a quick few moments as I have to mention two things:

Thing, first: Everyone should have a cousin as awesome as my Cousin Bubbles, who got up with me at 4:30AM (yes, folks.. in the MORNING) on Black Friday and then stood in line with me outside a store... WITHOUT COFFEE (serious pats on her back for putting up with me sans caffeine)... for 3 hours... behind an old man who apparently had too much turkey the day before (we know this because he tried to kill us with his exhaust emissions the whole time)... so I could shop for 15 minutes and buy my kid an XBox360 @ $100.00 below cost.

SHE ROCKS!!!! Especially because just after, she drove me to Starbucks to stave off the cranky, which was finally rearing its flesh-eating zombie-like head -- and THEN went to the mall with me for more shopping with crazy people! Cousin Bubbles --- Muah!! I love you. And that whole thing about eating your brains if you didn't take me to Starbucks... I wasn't serious. Much. Not that it matters since you DID take me. Heh.

Thing, second: I say this with that leaning-forward-have-to-tell-you-a-secret intensity, which always gives me goosebumps on my arms:

Pumpkin cupcakes. With Egg Nog cream filling. And Bourbon-Caramel Cream Cheese Frosting.

Oh Dear Lord... they were SO fruitbatting good. I could have sat there and eaten half of them. Easily. And not felt the least bit guilty (trust me, I tried to). They were So. Damn. Good. I'll admit I was worried for just a bit about the flavor combinations but woooo-weeee, I wasted a lot of time with those worries. I'm only sorry I don't have pictures for you all. Alas, they were eaten so quickly, I could only take pictures of crumbs. And I wouldn't do that to y'all.

Thing, third: Yes, I know I said "two things". I lied. Friday night, after we dragged ourselves back to the house, exhausted by frenzied shopping with crazy people, my Daddy decided to cook crepes (or "creepies" as my Uncle likes to call them). The man is a crepe cooking machine. I have no clue how many he made but the toppings took up an entire kitchen. We had warm apples with brown sugar, cinnamon, and crushed pecans, strawberries, assorted jams, peanut butter, miniature M&Ms, brown sugar, white sugar, powdered sugar, whipped cream, cinnamon, nutmeg, pecans... Good Dog, I can't even remember if there was more (but I think there might have been). It was Crepe Heaven and when I die, I want to go there. Forever. My favorite flavor combination was rather simple: a tiny dusting of brown sugar, cinnamon, fresh strawberries, and whipped cream. YUM!

The kids' favorite? Peanut butter, strawberries, M&M's, powdered sugar, and whipped cream. Yes. They all OD'd on sugar and remained in comas for the entire weekend. It made the drive home quite nice.

And now I am home. And I'm downright giddy with excitement over the first cold spell set to hit tomorrow morning. Except for one minor distraction...

Last night, Mr. Clean left our front gate open and our little Mini Aussies went prowling (don't worry, we yelled for them and they came right back). Now, I'm not sure what they went looking for or, for that matter, where they went at all. I do, however, know exactly what they found. I smelled it the moment they got onto the porch. Those fluffy butted little boys REEK of skunk. Not like direct spray reekage but more like "Sniff. Sniff. Oh shit... Run! Run! Run!" reekage.

Mr. Clean cannot smell this odor on them. He thinks they are fine (while I am choking and saying, "Are you shitting me? How can you NOT smell that?"). Still, he bathed them tonight with Dawn. And then brought them into the house... where they proceeded to rub their still stinky reekage of SKUNK all over my newest crocheted blanket. Beneath which I lay. Screaming.

Funny thing -- I actually kind of like the smell of skunk. In a very weird I-am-mentally-ill kinda way.

Not funny thing -- I do NOT like the smell of skunk on dogs who routinely sit as close as possible to me (or ON me) and then rub themselves all over me while begging for attention (because they, like my spawnlings, are also seriously deprived of affection as I will not buy them an HDTV). And? Mr. Clean STILL cannot smell the skunk. I think he has an olfactory malfunction of the worst kind. And now I'm wondering about all the times he's told me I smell good.

Edited to Add: I need help. Quickly. Since it will get SO cold tomorrow night, I have to bring the reeky fluffy-butts in my house. How can I quickly get rid of this smell without (and here's the hard part) necessarily getting them wet? Because, see... they get bathed Outside. Not inside. And outside will be 58 degrees by 9am, and 38 degrees by 3pm. I'm seriously considering sprinkling my entire mass of baking soda on them. Any ideas? I'm kinda desperate.
2 Responses
  1. Anonymous Says:

    I should have not read this one... I missed so much this year with the family... :(
    Yall made crepes without me.. I am in tears...

  2. dragonfly Says:

    We missed you too!! And just for the record, booger, that was only the 2nd time I've had Daddy's crepes! You and Pixie got them all the time (and never told me about them). You're both stinkers for holding out on me.