A few tidbits from today...
Me (after being interrupted from work for the umpteenth time): When are you going to leave me alone?
Doodlebug (after putting his finger to his lips in deep thought): I don't know. Maybe never. You wouldn't know what to do if I left you alone.
The sad part is that he's right. I'd spend the first ten minutes doing cartwheels and squealing, "Yippee! I'm ALONE!" and then I'd look around and wonder what to do with myself.
Shaggy (in an overtly loud voice for my ears): Ohhhh, Doodlebug. You shouldn't have FOOD in your room. You're going to get cockroaches!
Doodlebug: I DON'T have food in my room SHAGGY. It's in my HAND.
Shaggy: Doesn't matter. You're going to get big ugly cockroaches and you KNOW what happens when Mom sees cockroaches.
Doodlebug (walking the remainder of his sandwich back to the kitchen): Yeah, she goes to the crazy place.
Doodlebug (to me): Isn't that right Mom? Like the other day*, when you were standing on your bed screaming? That really hurt my ears by the way. And it sort of scared me too. It was just a roach, you know.
*Just to clarify - I have had exactly TWO roaches in my house over the last 12 years. One decided our house looked inviting and waltzed in the front door one night. With us. The second decided to crawl across my bare foot while I was in the bathroom the other day. I sort of lost it. Okay, I seriously lost my shit and stood on my bed screaming while Shaggy attempted to chase it down and kill it (with MY shoe, no less!). I don't do roaches - under any circumstances.
EDIT: Mr. Clean would like me to add that it's always fun coming home after a long day of work to find your wife, gone hysterical, on the bed screaming about roaches and how she's never sleeping in the house again until all their nasty carcasses are GONE. GONE. GONE.
-- I have no decent response to that.
Me (after being interrupted from work for the umpteenth time): When are you going to leave me alone?
Doodlebug (after putting his finger to his lips in deep thought): I don't know. Maybe never. You wouldn't know what to do if I left you alone.
The sad part is that he's right. I'd spend the first ten minutes doing cartwheels and squealing, "Yippee! I'm ALONE!" and then I'd look around and wonder what to do with myself.
Shaggy (in an overtly loud voice for my ears): Ohhhh, Doodlebug. You shouldn't have FOOD in your room. You're going to get cockroaches!
Doodlebug: I DON'T have food in my room SHAGGY. It's in my HAND.
Shaggy: Doesn't matter. You're going to get big ugly cockroaches and you KNOW what happens when Mom sees cockroaches.
Doodlebug (walking the remainder of his sandwich back to the kitchen): Yeah, she goes to the crazy place.
Doodlebug (to me): Isn't that right Mom? Like the other day*, when you were standing on your bed screaming? That really hurt my ears by the way. And it sort of scared me too. It was just a roach, you know.
*Just to clarify - I have had exactly TWO roaches in my house over the last 12 years. One decided our house looked inviting and waltzed in the front door one night. With us. The second decided to crawl across my bare foot while I was in the bathroom the other day. I sort of lost it. Okay, I seriously lost my shit and stood on my bed screaming while Shaggy attempted to chase it down and kill it (with MY shoe, no less!). I don't do roaches - under any circumstances.
EDIT: Mr. Clean would like me to add that it's always fun coming home after a long day of work to find your wife, gone hysterical, on the bed screaming about roaches and how she's never sleeping in the house again until all their nasty carcasses are GONE. GONE. GONE.
-- I have no decent response to that.
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