I've been neglecting the blog again. The honest truth of it, though, is that I just don't have too much to say right now. I could fill pages with workplace angst (putting it nicely) but I promised myself I wouldn't mention work here. You just never know who's watching. I won't even get started on how much Crap I think it is to have to worry about such things.

But topping even that overcooked mess of aggravations is my raging insomnia. It seems to be getting worse as summer gets closer. Personally, I think the whole thing is a throwback from high school. You know how school let out for summer and suddenly you found yourself partying until the sun came up? No? Well that was me. Lord, but did I have a good time. I was the girl who never got tired. The one who was always up for the Next! New! Adventure! Drive two hours to the beach at one in the morning? Let's go! Come on... really. Let's GO! You know you want to... (and it was always worth it)

Except, somewhere along the line, my body didn't notice when summer was over. So now, many years later, my internal clock jumps up and shouts, "Party Time!" around 9 p.m. and doesn't shut down again until somewhere near 3 a.m. - which would be great if I didn't have a day job. Not so good when the alarm goes off at 7 and my brain is bawling for more sleep like a newborn for a boob.

And when I'm tired... I'm cranky. Bitch-kitty-don't-even-Look-at-me Cranky. Which, invariably, leads to me being cranky about my crankiness. It's a vicious circle of weepy tiredness wearing hot pink plaid Cranky Pants. Fun for all!

But, hey! I could take Pills to make me sleep. Pretty, shiny pills that will put dreams of floaty neon green moths in my sleeping-like-the-dead brain (where I can't escape them)! Umm, no thanks. I'll stick to the 2 a.m. Googling marathons. It works wonders. Who came up with the idea of glow in the dark bugs to make people feel safe and sleepy anyhow? BUGS! I have enough issues with the current dream movies playing in my head, thank you very much. I surely don't need bugs waiting to hear me snore so they can turn into Incredible Hulk-ish blood suckers just itching to snack on my dead-to-the-world body. You keep your bugs. I'll keep my money and what's left of my sanity.

The sanity - she is hanging by a thread. A 23,000 word thread. I'm that far into my WIP (2nd round). It's going. Slowly, but going. (thanks, in part, to LOST and American Idol - Chris! You were robbed!) It's picking up speed like a little steam engine, though. I can feel it. I've been chugging and chugging and I think perhaps I'm just cresting that damn mountain. Just a leeeeeetle farther (when all the season finales have aired) and I'll be sailing down the other side, doing ninety to nothin'. I find myself jotting down bits of dialogue as I plog through the workday. I've been caught grabbing a few hundred words here and there between other things which need my attention. I've brought my laptop to the kitchen twice this week, to write while I cook. I'll know I'm there when I manage to burn dinner.

Certainly, I could be writing at this moment. Instead of blogging. Instead of Googling. But then, instead of going to bed at 3 a.m., I'd get all focused and involved - not noticing the time at all until a ray of sun caught my eye through the window shade.

Two seconds later, I'd collapse in a heap of snores - completely unaware of anything until at least Noon. And, unfortunately... That. Won't. Work.

There. A blog. In the middle of the week, even!
| edit post
1 Response
  1. Dancinfairy Says:

    I am also having so much trouble sleeping. I need at least 7 hours a night and mine are filled with waking up every hour and crazy-ass dreams when I do actually sleep.

    I am pleased that the writing is going well.